- The wind sweeps over the Gulf of Trieste
they say it will be storm force by morning
clouds scud with anticipation
rains fail to fall. - When I was in school, during heavy rains
we spent ‘wet playtime’ reading comic books
cross-legged on the parquet floor
of the school hall. - Will we be home for Christmas?
I wonder, then I laugh at myself remembering
being home for Christmas
assumes a notion of where home is. - Dinnertime is like a tolling bell
it’s more a duty than a joy to me
places to set, plates to clear but still
I want you to eat well. - Anthropocene signalling:
the fires, the floods, the gales
internal screaming, external calm
I want you to live.
© 2021 experimentsinfiction.com. All Rights Reserved.
A Cadralor for dVerse
Tonight, Björn hosts Meeting the Bar, and has asked us to write a Cadralor: a new poetry form invented in 2020 by the editors of Gleam Magazine, and introduced to dVerse by Jane Dougherty.
The bar opens at 3pm EST. Join us to try your hand at writing one!
Also linking to earthweal’s Open Link Weekend #87.
Oh what a powerful ending. We want the children to live as well… and Anthropocene will include humans as well (probably already does)… you really let this sneak in through the way you described the rainless storm and the domestic life of putting food on the table.
Thank you Björn: I’m not sure some of the stanzas were visual enough, but I liked the effect anyway!
oh but they were visual Ingrid and there is an inner/outer tension as the stanzas take us in or away from our Anthropocene weather
Thank you Laura: I don’t think imagery is my strong point as I tend to describe what’s going on internally , but I suppose that is imagery in its own way!
imagery begins with the inner eye 😉
True!
I felt like this was really you talking to me, if that makes sense. Like your side of a conversation telling me about your memories, the mundane task, and the hopes and fears for your children.
I suppose that’s what it is: stream of consciousness in a way!
Well, I enjoyed it! 😀
I agree, this is incredibly potent, Ingrid! I resonate with; “Anthropocene signalling: the fires, the floods, the gales
internal screaming, external calm I want you to live.” The world as we know it is in a dire state and begs for much needed care and attention. 💝💝
I agree! Thank you Sanaa, if only 💕
Learning, caring, home and wanting to protect them is my takeaway. I like how these threads get tied together in the end. Nicely done, Ingrid.
Thank you Lisa 😊
You’re welcome.
p.s. That image is soooo beautiful, and yes well worth wanting to keep safe <3
That is my current hometown!
Oh my word, that looks like heaven. No chain store billboards, no factory smokestacks…
There is one factory complete with chimney but it was abandoned some years ago.
Just curious, how do people earn money there?
Well traditionally it was fishing, and there are still a lot of fishermen but I think mostly from tourism nowadays. There’s also a huge commercial port just up the road. Lots of people work there!
Awesome!
Your final stanza is a reminder that, in spite of appearances, nature is just as fragile as we are.
Unfortunately, yes. And I think we are all feeling those effects to some extent.
I think you rocked the form.
I myself however, am absolutely gob smacked by these words:
“being home for Christmas
assumes a notion of where home is.”
There is SO much truth in these words. For some, Christmas is a painful season.
It is always a struggle for me, Lillian, thank you for picking out those lines!
Intrigued by this form! I like how past, present and future is described here. An eerie feel!
Thank you Tricia: the winds sound quite eerie at the moment!
resonates deeply Ingrid, you really nailed the form. And unfolding it from the domestic viewpoint added to it’s potency! well done
Thank you Kate 🙏
pleasure 🙂
thank you ingrid for the new word “Anthropocene” has now been added to my vocabulary. great poem as well
Thanks Rog! My spell check still doesn’t recognise it.
👍
The thread of love is the strongest one. Powerful. (K)
That’s what I think. Thank you Kerfe.
I went to reply to your comment on Confluence and it totally disappeared…(sigh). but thanks!
what a wonderful poem Dear Ingrid and I love your always weaving your biggest passion and purpose of the Anthropocene into it.. fiery and fierce … now i could only say the word.. hahah💖
I struggle with it as well, which is slightly embarrassing given the title of my book 😅💕🌎
oh good… glad I’m not alone but when I hear you say it on the 7th and you here you say it.. we will be experienced. 💖
I hope so 😅🙏😅
oh you will and so will i.. you’re a good teacher. the boys told me.🌷
I hope so 😅
🤞💕
Love this, Ingrid! <3 Beautiful photo of your hometown. Like all of your writing, one thing I appreciate so much is the forthrightness and authenticity. Nothing seems sugar-coated or guarded. I feel I am hearing your true voice when you talk about not particularly enjoying preparing supper, and though I usually enjoy cooking, I feel the same way sometimes.
The last verse especially touched me. I will probably not live to see very much of the results of the destruction of our environment by deforestation, fossil fuels, pollution and all the rest, but I feel very sad for those who will inherit this mess!
I heard on the news yesterday that the extensive dead zones in the oceans today are from fossil fuels burned in the 1970s. Emissions have since doubled, and the effects will be felt for the next fifty years. Scientists are finding ways to help mitigate these effects, but we cannot afford to wait to transition to green energy!
Have a great day! 🙂
Thank you for your kind words, Cheryl.
I don’t like cooking when I have to do it, if that makes sense. But I love baking!
Frightening news about the oceans. I keep hearing headlines about an impending energy crisis, but no one seems to be discussing the need to limit our energy use.
This is a very unique type of poetry. Some very interesting and lovely lines. ❤️Joni
It’s an interesting form to try out. Thank you Joni ❤️
You are so welcome. ❤️
There is a progression which i luv. Ending with a call to home and strong survival instincts. Nice
Much💜love
Thank you Gillena ❤️
Firstly, the imagery of your hometown is lovely. Secondly, I felt your mother’s love and pride, specially with the ending stanza.
I am glad that came across Grace, thank you 🙏
I think the five unrelated stanzas represent life, meaning much of our day, life, or thoughts may seem unrelated, but somehow one experience or idea merges with another. Your poem is a beautiful example of this. To end this meandering with what we yearn for is a powerful way to end. A creative write with an interesting form. 👏🏼
I think it’s a really interesting form to play around with. I really wasn’t sure what would come out when I started, but these were the images which came to me ❤️
I think it is too. Very creative! One of the joys of writing… being surprised by what shows up. 🥰 A wonderful write with this new form. 😃
Thanks again Michele 🥰
I love how the simple everyday observances and thoughts fill our heads as we go about our lives and all the while the planet is dying around us. I had plenty of visuals Ingrid, in your head and your descriptive stanzas. Well done ☺️💕
I’m glad to hear that Christine, thank you 💕
I like the shift from the domestic worry of children and food to the drama of the world going down the pan.
Welcome to my world 😅
🙂
Restless thoughts and powerful emotions expressed in the weather…this moves me, Ingrid.
I am glad to hear that, Lynn.
I noted that you thought perhaps you haven’t quite pulled enough of a “film like” descriptive quality to this form/piece, and in some ways, this might be “true” – if you approach it quite literally, BUT I think, and FEEL, that your word choices, the line breaks, the way you’ve pieced this together IS very effective – because sometimes, the spaces between the lines create and complete, and there is a haunting energy here – it really sings, or moans, like the winds or rain. I really like this – I think you’ve taken images, ideas and thoughts, and stripped them back, offering us just the barest of what we need, and yet you touch on the existential angst, the push-pull, of the mundane, the necessary – and the bigger issues too …. I think you’ve succeeded well enough Ingrid! This is definitely an interesting poem, rich and evocative. 🙂
Thank you so much! It may not be a true cadralor, but I enjoyed where the exercise took me 😊
I think the best aspect is the deeper introduction to the form, and then, as you’ve noted, letting it inspire and lead …. and ultimately, whether we label something as “true to form” or not, the end results, the creative process and what we have IS what counts. 🙂
A beautifully composed poem, a difficult form. Your mention of ‘wet playtime’ reminded me of Girl Scout camp on rainy afternoons we spent in the hayloft of a barn telling stories and singing. Cheers, Ingrid.
Good times! 😊 thank you Helen ❤️
Ingrid,
Astonishing to me how you drive home the impending threat to life and love, duty and desire (e.g., home), as gale winds close in! Powerfully rendered by your images, so show mastery of this new form. Well done.
pax,
dora
“I want you to live” it is powerful as well as poignant. Though I enjoy cooking, the same routine can be so suffocating. Love this, Ingrid. Your words always resonate. ❤️
Thanks Punam: I’m not very good at routine sometimes, but I try to see it like a meditation these days ❤️
Ha! That’s a good way to look at it! You are welcome. 😊
That final line is a gem of poetic ambiguity. I love it.
Thank you!
Powerful stanzas including the dinnertime drudgery that ends with well wishes. Wonderful.
I am glad you liked it, thanks K!
You raise one of my enduring questions, where is home, and yes, the longing for all things to have life.
Thank you Paul: I think anyone who has moved around a lot is bound to feel this.
Yes, I have certainly moved a few times, it sure did make sense and touched a nerve 🙂
I love each stanza, especially the last one. So nice.
I am so glad you enjoyed it, thank you!
The fear of what’s to come made searingly powerful by the memories. I love this form and your rendering of it!
Thank you Xan!
The thing I notice after reading this form all morning and the various ways people have used it, is that by compacting your visual element–not neglecting it–you make the reader focus on the concepts and conditions you are wanting them to see rather than on a string of adjectives. It’s very effective, as is the sparse, directed nature of the line work. I really appreciate the skill with which you present your ideas, and the emotion and authenticity behind them as well.
Thank you so much, I really appreciate your kind words 😊
Wow, lots of comments. This is an intriguing form. I really enjoyed it and relate to the inner scream, the outer calm…….and the wanting the loved one to eat well and live. Awesome.
Thank you Sherry!
Such a good write Ingrid – a very powerful last stanza. I find this form intriguing..
Thank you, Lindi – me too! I may explore it further…
It is an interesting form – a piling of elements, building into a storm. It wrings an emotional tenor that fits your theme well. The hugeness and the dailiness both.
Thank you Brendan.
This is lovely, Ingrid. I identify with the second stanza 😀 I remember those play times to from school! I particularly liked the third stanza for it almost sardonic irony but also truth 🙂
Thanks, Sunra: the nostalgia of childhood in 80s Britain 😅
These threads of mothering–both human and nature–were finely woven together. Love it!
Thank you so much!
I haven’t tried this form yet, but I will. You have some interesting imagery with words. The transition in thoughts works well to the fiery ending.
Thank you: it’s an enjoyable form to play with!
after all, we all yearn for home ~
Wherever that may be!
Love the build up and crescendo
Thank you 🙏
Your words effectively placed our mundane life against the greater force of nature. How little we are compared to the world around us.
That is a very good point! Thank you.
Beautiful poetry. Every word is full of meaning. Sliding from a pen full of love. Let me follow your blog.
Thank you kindly!
You’re welcome 😊. Let me follow your blog
😊